Mother

This weekend, we celebrated my second Mother’s Day. We took a family walk and picked up some delicious brunch, we spent quality time outside playing, and Miles even took a long nap in his crib!

Everything I said is 100% true—but if we zoom in on that paragraph, you’ll discover that Pablo lost his marbles when we were handed our takeout by the server at the restaurant we ordered from. Miles also ate his delicious brunch well into the afternoon, after refusing it in the morning, only to experience the first sugar rush (and wild, screaming crash) of his life. Our outside time was a feeble attempt to keep Pablo and Miles calm and happy, and that long crib nap was our only moment of peace all day.

All of this was happening while I was getting messages of support for my Mother’s Day social media campaign with Hudson’s Bay. It was so cool and surreal to have part of my story as a mom shared on such a platform, and through a brand that I’ve known of since I was a kid, out shopping with my mom!

It just goes to show that motherhood is chock full of contradictions. On the same day, I was celebrating being a mom, but also wishing to take a break from my kid. I was also receiving messages about what a great job I was doing as a mom, while feeling wildly inadequate as Miles fussed and screamed, and fought his to stay awake during his second nap time.

Last week, I cried (and took the only crying selfie I will ever take in my life) after we dropped Miles off at my mother in-law’s for the day, so I could get some uninterrupted work done—an opportunity I have been hoping for since I came back to work.

My camera roll is a perfect example of what my life is as a mom. Every cute photo or video is sandwiched between photos and videos of a hard-to-wrangle dog and baby, crying, messes, dinners that Kane and I have to had to eat in shifts—the works.

A friend replied to something I posted recently and thanked me for my “accurate representation of motherhood that isn’t all cuteness and butterflies,” and that felt like SUCH a compliment. Being a parent is full of opposing feelings, challenges and rewards, and overwhelming love for your kid, even when they are annoying the hell out of you. I never want to pretend like it isn’t. I hope other parents out there remember that we’re all going through it, even when the photos we post might suggest otherwise.